my week 💝

Finally, a week of no puffer jackets. There was whispers of spring in the air and it seemed like everyone heard it. Something shifted, and Ive felt extraordinarily content the last seven days. I’ve been going on the swings first thing in the morning (before I even look at my phone), and I think it just may be changing my life. The thrill of flying and the nostalgia it brings is the best wakeup call I could ask for. Monday was my last day of recovery, and followed by suspiciously good days. I had an amazing craft night with the girls, fortuitously ran into friends, used the library as my cubicle, and went on some amazing walks- including one with a stop at the American girl store. The sun shined down on me and those I love as we giggled and sang through the streets. I looked at my phone at 5:16 every day. My favorite number was carved into the tree I used to tie my shoe, life matched the beat of the song playing in my ears, and all my conversations kept somehow connecting. It feels like I’m back on the right track, like my recent bad moods have just been leading me to this sense of bliss. I’ve found myself trying to translate these serendipities into signs, as if there is some deeper meaning to things just simply being awesome.

Why is there a deep-seated belief that something valuable must be hard to find? I guess at a certain point everything essential was elusive- food, water, fire- and that must be where it all began. It’s ingrained in us that special things are difficult to come by- absurd beauty standards make natural beauty a rarity, attention is considered more meaningful if harder to obtain, finding love is presented like searching for a needle in a haystack, complex esoteric understanding is thought to be more profound than simple knowledge, earning something makes it more substantial than simply receiving. And if we endure enough pain, we might possibly understand the meaning of life.

I often find myself keeping track of correspondences and connections, hoping the little harmonies will decode some hidden message or sign. A sign of what though? I literally don’t know. It’s kinda like the “Squint and you’ll see Steve Harvey” illusion that forms Steve Harvey out of a burger. Yeah sure I get to see Steve Harvey, but I miss the burger right in front of me. I spend too much time squinting, trying to see what the omens and correlations are trying to really show me. I’ll find ways to resonate with the tides, keep a mental tally of the blue jays, search for new etchings in the sidewalks, and then try to decipher what it could all mean. I love being a seeker of the unseen, it feels like an archeologist, unearthing the hidden meanings in everyday interactions. But it’s like trying to solve a puzzle without knowing what the final image is. I can make the pieces fit, and I’m enjoying my time doing so, but what is the end goal?

Searching for answers in these foreign ways is definitely more instinctual than logical, though as much as I am aware of that, I will probably never stop. I find comfort in the synchronicities. I want to believe that the trees know what I need and that the clouds can show me my future if I look hard enough. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and I could search for those reasons all day long, but this week I tried to just accept the universes gifts and let things feel good. And it felt good. I feel like its all going to be okay and warmth is coming. There’s no need to find the meaning of life when you have the sun hitting your face.

One of my favorite places to work is the Rose reading room at the public library by Bryant park. It’s gorgeous, quiet, and there is outlets galore. On my way out I love to stop in the treasures room and say hello to the Winnie the Pooh originals. Here are a few goodies that tickled my fancy this visit.

I loved listening to music this week. I was in a happy-go-lucky mood and what I listened to reflected that for the most part. I got into an album listening groove and forgot how much fun it is to listen to a project as a whole. I also got hooked on the show The Traitors this week, and have been watching more Handmaids Tale. February has come to a close so here is the final February playlist , as well as some of the albums I listened to + my songs of the week!

Okay, I think that’s what I wanna share from this week. Im really having a lot of fun doing this and I hope y’all are enjoying. What else are you interested in seeing or hearing about? Id be happy to oblige. Wishing you all a fabulous week. This spring and summer is going to be a movie I can just feel it.

xx Isabel